Tuesday, 10 December 2019

Preparations, plans, losses and future wins.

This time last year, I was making last minute plans to book a mini break for my husband and I. Nothing quite went to plan and in actual fact, the last minute arrangements ended up being perfect as we quickly realised that time spent alone and together was the perfect gift. Cue melancholy, romantic music with uplifting climb. It felt even more of a success since it was our second Christmas mini-break in a row. When Christmas isn't particularly your thing, making post Christmas day plans (the sort that you have fantasised about for years but haven't either dared or managed to execute) really is the dreamy antidote. Sadly, this year, my mama (the one who always makes these trips possible) is being Grandma to my niece and visiting my sister for Christmas plus as her health hasn't been the best in recent months it felt only right to forgo our new tradition. Last year we spent in one of our favourite cities - Bristol. We adventured and walked and drank coffee and wine, ate breakfasts and tapas and street food. We shopped, took walks along promenades and piers and talked. Really talked. In that kind of words spilling and laughter falling and silences enjoyed kind of a way. The year before that we were holed up in the most beautiful, cosy converted train wagon in the middle of a forest in Wales with birdsong, a woodburner and a room full of books for company. This year there are no real plans as yet, just one prerequisite cited by each of our unit of four - simplicity. We are hoping that this is our last Christmas in this home of ours that has served us so wonderfully over the last eleven years. There are plans for our next home waiting in the works, patience to wait further is demanding and at times stifling. This home that we currently inhabit is the only home that my youngest has ever known, he came home to this place. My eldest has known it since he turned three. The walls are marked with their measurements in height with scribbled handwriting alongside giving the date of them being measured. Their finger marks and hand prints and signatures decorate this home in ways that warm the heart, a reminder that in all the ways that I am so fussy, this is one thing that bothers me not. So, I share this now I suppose, because amongst other things, this has been on my mind. This letting go and bidding farewell to a season, a chapter, a hugely significant portion of time. Starting with babies and preparing to move on with young boys. What a ride it has been. For now, we are here but perhaps by next year, we will in our new home not far from this one, perhaps even, we will make that trip to explore where my husband grew up as a child, the place that he has never shared with his own offspring. Perhaps, those are the plans to begin making. This is where it all begins surely? Speaking of it, thinking of it and making a wish upon a star. And just like that, I remember something dear about this time of year. Making plans with those you hold dear, even the simplest of things can be the greatest of gifts. Time is precious.

No comments:

Post a Comment